Are you a mean mom?
I am...or at least that's what I'm told.
And do you know what? I'm ok with that.
Take today for example.
By 7:25 AM, both Ashlynn and Breven were grounded for the day because they were fighting over who got to use the bathroom first. Ashlynn was (according to Breven) exerting her "inner girl" and trying to rip Breven's arm off. Breven was (according to Ashlynn) trying to cause a problem. I don't know about you, but I'm not about to be nice at 7:25 AM when two fighting kids are about to wake up my baby who just happens to be sleeping peacefully in the next room. No discussion took place. No explanation was needed. They were just grounded. Period.
I have a tendency to do that...not put up with any, for lack of a better word, crap, from my kids. It's one of the reasons my kids consider me a mean mom.
I expect a lot from my kids....(and just for the record, I think my kids are pretty outstanding!)
My kids are expected to do their chores well...and in a timely fashion. I'm a mean mom!
My kids are required to do homework everyday. I'm a mean mom!
My kids don't get to play video games every day...only on the weekends (after they've completed all their chores ON TIME.) I'm a mean mom!
My kids don't just get to go and play with whoever they want whenever they want. I have to know where they are and who they are with. I'm a mean mom!
(I'm sure there are more reasons that I can't think of right now.)
Ashlynn and I had a conversation last year that went something like this:
(Ashlynn was in trouble for some reason I can't remember now)
Ashlynn: Mom, why can't you be nice like everyone else' mom?
Mom: Because I'm not everyone else' mom.
Ashlynn: Mom, you're suppose to be nice...you're suppose to be my friend!
Mom: No Ashlynn, I'm not suppose to be your friend. I'm your mom...that means it's my responsibility to make sure that you're doing what you're suppose to be doing and if it means that you don't like me, then so be it. Hopefully down the road I'll get to be more than your mom...hopefully I'll get to be your friend too, but for the time being if all I am is your mean mom, I'm o.k. with that.
When I think about my childhood I don't remember my mom as being a mean mom. I remember her telling me that I had to clean my room or do my other chores. I remember her expecting me to get good grades. I remember her wanting to know where I was going, who I was going to be with, and when I was going to be home, but I don't remember her being a mean mom. Hopefully my kids will look back on their childhood in the same way. (It may take a while for them to realize I'm not trying to be mean...I'm just trying to be mom.)
Motherhood...it's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it.
4 comments:
I love this post Cassie. I agree completely.
To use a Kennyism: mother's who don't teach their kids right and wrong from an early age are weak sauce!
So in my mind you are not mean, you just care more than a friend would.
Way to be a mean mom. I would rather be a mean mom any day than an uninterested, and inattentive mom. My mom was a mean mom by description, but she's also my friend. When did the transition take place? When I was old enough to see why she was being a mean mom and understand what a mean mom really is. Too many parents try to be a friend and loose their kid's respect.
Christiana and I have had that same conversation. It's true, I remember my mom making me do all those things, but I don't think she was a mean mom. She was just being Mom. Now we are great friends and one of the reasons is because I know she always wants what is best for me.
Post a Comment